“Opposite-sex relationship” is an issue most people cannot avoid. Single or married, those who have been in love before understand how an opposite-sex relationship affects us. In fact, most people think they understand how it works, but they do not realize the enormous effect an opposite-sex relationship has on our lives. This relationship involves interactions between men and women, an extremely important part of life, including dating with the opposite gender before marriage, the relationship between husband and wife after getting married, and the family relationship after giving birth. An opposite-sex relationship affects the quality and quantity of life, work performance, interpersonal relationships. And all aspect of in everyday life.

The three perpetrators of relationships

1. Ineffective Communication

Most people have a misunderstanding of communication, often mistaking “talking” as “communicating”. Here communicating refers to open communication and listening. When you listen in the moment, you are quiet without passing judgment and there are no distractions. The elements of communication are: Live in the moment and timely respond to confirm communication (such as nodding, saying hmm, different gestures, etc.). Timely repeat, interpret and summarize each other’s contents to confirm the other’s feelings and commitments.

2. Uncoordinated Sex Life

Whether a couple is satisfied with their sex life or not is an element that affects any relationship. You may find this statement bold, but we cannot deny the fact that it exists.

3. Money

When it comes to money, “Which do you choose, love or bread?” may come to mind. In fact, most people they can have love and bread at the same time. If that were the case, why is money one of the culprits that destroy relationships? The problem is not the money itself, but our concept of money. If you are familiar with the money law, you will know that it is not money that creates a good opposite-sex relationship; instead, it is a good relationship that leads to money.

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The five elements of intimate relationships

1. Love and Acceptance

“I love you and accept you 100% unconditionally”.
If I asked you to write down the names of three people that are the most important in your life, whose names would you write?
Is your name in the names you wrote down?
If you are not the most important, who can give the best to the people important to you?
Before we love and accept others 100% unconditionally, we must first learn to love and accept ourselves 100% unconditionally, so that we can contribute unconditionally to our partners.
Compared to searching for love, it is more important to find our better self.

2. Intimacy and Honesty

When we are able to love and accept others 100% unconditionally, we will be able to treat our partner with empathy. We will be able to get over our partner’s past and that of our own, and together we can make each day count. We will look at our partner with appreciation and gratitude, and this kind of relationship is rich and rewarding.

3. Communication

Openly communicate and listen. You listen in the moment; you are quiet without evaluating.

Communication elements:
Live in the moment:
Timely respond to confirm communication (such as nodding, saying hmm, different gestures, etc.).
Timely repeat each other’s contents;
Timely interpret and summarize each other’s contents;
Confirm each other’s feelings and commitment.
Effective Communication Tips:
When a man listens to a woman, the most important thing is to listen to the woman’s feelings; when a woman is listening to a man, the most important part is to listen to the man’s commitment.

4. Honesty, Honor, and Respect

Being a relationship is full of vitality. We need to have integrity, honor, and respect for each other, which can be better established after we unconditionally love and accept ourselves 100% unconditionally. Even if you have been in love for a long term, mutually honoring and respecting each other is still essential. You can set a “couple secret code” known to both of you, such as “ouch”, so that whenever one side accidentally “freaks out”, once the person hears the “ouch” secret code, he or she will know it is time to stop.

5. Coordinated Sex Life

Coordinated sex life can give rise to a chemical reaction in other areas of life, which is why it is one of the elements affecting relationships. You may find it explicit, but we cannot deny the fact that it exists.